I struggle on a daily basis at times to be the mother I want to be.

You see when my first blessing Lily came in to this world, I was only 2 months off turning 18, in so many ways I was still a child myself.

I had an upbringing that was turbulent to say the least however I think in a lot of ways this was what prepared me to be a mother so young.

The biggest challenge for me recently has been that now Lil is approaching a “pre-teen” age, she is craving more mummy time.

Things have been harder since we became a family of 4, not because she didn’t want a sibling but it has meant time has now had to be shared between her and her brother.

So we have focused as much as possible on trying for quality vs quantity and having some one on one mummy time has seemingly helped.

Today was one of the moments as a parent that your heart truly could explode. I took Lily to see a mini concert in our towns mall by Reuben Koops, you can see my previous blog post about Reuben here – http://bit.ly/1q2MR3n

It was a surprise and I didn’t tell her what we were doing just that we were heading to the mall, the expression of pure joy and excitement in her face was irreplaceable ❤

Today made all of the hard days as a parent worth it.

I hope that one day Lily will reflect on her childhood and remember not so much that Mum worked 40 hours a week but that we worked so we could give her everything we possibly could, so that she could receive a wonderful education, so that she could see places around Australia and in time all around the world but mostly I hope she reflects on her life and remembers being LOVED by so many people she never had to feel alone.

So Lily if you read this one day, I love you and I know I am far from the perfect parent but I love you with everything I have in me & I am so blessed to have you as my daughter, there will be times in your life you will hate me and in these times I hope you can understand I am only trying to protect you. There will also be others that only I will be the one who can heal the pain. I will always be here for you and will continue daily to give you as much as this world has to offer and as you would say “Never let anyone dull your sparkle”

MrsJRad aka Mumma Bear xxx